I mistook comfort for safety.
Silence for intention.
Attention for care.

I filled in the blanks
with hope
because hope is what I do
when I get tired of guarding myself.

They never lied.
That’s the part that hurts the most.
They never promised a future,
never asked me to stay,
never said I was chosen.

They just showed up
when it suited them.
And I was there.
Open.
Willing.
Soft in a way I should have known better than to be.

I let myself believe
that being wanted meant being valued.
That consistency meant investment.
That comfort meant closeness.

It didn’t.

I was something to reach for
when the moment called for it.
A place to land.
A distraction.
A warmth that asked for nothing
and therefore cost nothing.

The truth arrives quietly.
Not with anger.
Not with blame.
Just clarity.

They didn’t take anything from me.
I handed it over
when I lowered my guard
and let myself imagine more
than what was offered.

The realization isn’t that I was fooled.
It’s that I wanted to believe
so badly
that I made room for a story
that was never being written.

And now I sit with that knowing.
Not shattered.
Just awake.

© Wynter Rayne 2025. All Rights Reserved.