It’s funny how we think we’re over something—until the wound rips open again, oozing with memories we didn’t ask to revisit.

Don’t get me wrong. I have zero desire to be with him ever again. That door is sealed shut, buried, and condemned. It wasn’t love. Honestly, looking back, I’m not sure it was ever even true friendship.

And yet, here we are, awkwardly playing at “friends” again. Polite check-ins. Empty small talk. Him pretending to care until I mention how happy I am now. That’s when he says it “stings” to hear me talk about the joy I’ve found with Sir—the healing, the wholeness, the way I’ve blossomed.

But let’s be honest: he never wanted me.
Not my body. Not my mind.
He never invested emotionally.
He never even read my writing—complained it was too long to hold his interest. (Three minutes. That’s all it asked of him.)
And for my birthday? Nothing special. Just tagging along to a bar where he was working. I stayed at his house that weekend and felt more like a burden than a guest. There was no effort. No thought. Not even a meal he cooked himself—just ordered takeout and called it a day.

Meanwhile, my empath heart knew.
I could feel him slipping away, even as I sat across from him. I felt the distance before it turned into silence. I spent my birthday feeling out of place, unwanted, and utterly unseen.

Fast forward to now—he’s found someone new. A plus-size woman.
And while I celebrate that someone like me is finally being seen through romantic eyes—let’s not pretend this doesn’t sting just a little.

Because I am also a plus-size woman.
And he didn’t want me.
But now he’s buying her gifts. Planning a special trip to see her. Surprising her with a flogger that looks like a rose bouquet for her birthday. Thoughtful. Creative. Romantic.

And I said nothing.
I didn’t mention the ache in my chest, the old scar that burned a little deeper.
Because I’ve healed. Mostly.
Because I know we both deserve happiness.
But let’s not twist the story:
You didn’t lose me. You let me go.
You didn’t want me…
You just didn’t want anyone else to have me either.

And now you have to witness the glow-up.
You have to watch me thrive in the very places you neglected.
You have to see someone else cherish the pieces of me you never bothered to unwrap.
And maybe that stings—but that sting is yours to carry.

As for me? I’m finally where I belong.
My father used to say,
“Give it time—trash always takes itself out.”
I get it now. And I’ve never felt lighter.

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